Updated: May 23
Lately, through conversations and in my bible time, this idea of missional marriage has been heavily on my heart, even more so now, then it was in my younger walk with Jesus. That there is mission and purpose outside myself. Of course, I want a companion and a helper in life and my own love story to unfold. I am very candid about that. But I also want to find someone that will serve Jesus alongside me and support my God-driven dreams and I, back them on their goals.
I had a glimpse of this when I dated a guy years ago and we served on the welcome team at church and in homeless outreach together. Sadly it didn’t end in marriage obviously, and God has another life partner in mind, but we wouldn’t even have dated as long as we did, if it weren’t for our foundation of our faith and I learned a lot in that six year relationship.
Through my ongoing personal singleness and singleness later in life in general in culture, God has really put it on my heart to encourage and build up other single women in their waiting. To help them see their worth, set higher standards, and not to settle for what the world says is good enough, but for God’s best. I want to create community where women can be open and honest about the struggles of dating and single living and have support. So, whoever I end up with, I want them to encourage me on this journey.
And I want to be excited about what God has put on their heart to achieve or be apart of, whether that mission is doing something together or being supportive about what we individually have going on. I think that will change as seasons of life change, but always having a Christ-centered marriage is very important to me.
This verse stuck out to me this past week and has been marinating in my mind.
“Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad and easy to travel is the path that leads to destruction and eternal loss, and there are many who enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow and difficult to travel is the path that leads the way to everlasting life, and there are few who find it.” Matthew 7: 13-14
Read that again. I think we are there in culture, where quick fixes and instant gratification is the norm. It’s easy to follow the herd. I know I have. It says it’s the easy way. But God didn’t call us to easy. He called us to greater. But that means harder. It says it will be difficult. I think of a hike. A quick, easy, little hike or a grueling, hard, uphill hike. But, oh the views from the top! And when you work hard for something, it feels so much better. There is such a sense of accomplishment, strength, and confidence. So for that, I don’t want the easy way out. And I think part of my singleness has been pruning me to be a better woman, wife, and mother someday in whatever capacity that looks like and that path has been extremely difficult at times. God is bringing more purpose to my life than I even thought about a decade ago. But that means going through some low places to get there. It’s easy to have faith on the mountaintop. It’s incredibly hard on the endless hiking days in the valley and there are so many distractions to derail you. But I’m trusting God for more, even when I don’t see it or feel it. I’m going after that narrow gate that is going to lead to abundant life in Christ. And I’m just looking for that man who wants to join me on the way.
“Two are better than one because they have a more satisfying return for their labor.” Ecclesiastes 4:9