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Updated: May 23, 2023

Well in my boredom and time ticking on, I have played on the dating apps recently. No dates. Just swiping and small chit chat. (Oh goody my favorite.) With one guy that seemed there could be potential, with general likes, faith, attraction; we talked over several days through texts and it lead to one thing. And no it wasn’t a date. But to this general theme of well you should just come over and watch a movie and have some wine……

Okay we all know what that is code for…and um excuse me? I have never even met you before! Ew. It just made my heart sad that this was the level of effort being put in these days?! This is your best foot forward? To which I replied, “Why I do enjoy wine, how about an actual date?” and to which I was ghosted. No response.

ghosting, don't settle, ghost

My thoughts here are that this must work and women go okay, I’d rather get some attention from a guy, then none at all, so I’ll just go over to see what he is all about. Then get physical immediately, such ending the “dating” period and the girl is left feeling sad, used, and lonely still. And the guy goes on to the next conquest and no real relationships are actually formed. No dates are even really taking place. This isn’t just my experience, but what I hear from clients, friends, neighbors, and acquaintances. That basically women have to settle for any hope of male affection and men are setting the bar real low and putting zero effort into dating. It’s very disappointing. And I know with technology, that things have really changed. But I encourage women to stay strong and hold their ground. Keep that standard of what is acceptable behavior high. Speak up for yourself in what you need and want. Make sure you are being respected and if not, do not be afraid to walk away! Boys don’t deserve women.

And men stop being so lazy! Start planning fun dates. Ask ladies out, take initiative and make plans. Let down your guard down and don’t be afraid to be emotionally vulnerable. Connect on a deeper level. Make dating fun. So then, us women can feel safe and allow for real relationships to actually form and blossom.

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